On speaking to my roommate today our usual conversation of her maybe, kind of, could be boyfriend, continued. We have spent weeks and days gossiping and talking about topic, it didn’t cross my mind that it was even the slightest bit odd, that the confusion of his feelings toward her where simply brought on by something so common. Of course he paid on dates, they even went on dates in the first place, they talked non stop, and he made her feel beautiful. What then, you might ask, would have us so confused. If he showed her affection and made time for her, then why would we question his feelings? He held her hand in public, and would put an arm around her on the usual double dates to roosters, but something was off. Well, of course he hasn’t yet asked her to be Facebook official. Ahhhh, the all famous phrase, all too many people, including myself, use today. If he doesn’t want to make it Facebook official, does he REALLY even like her, what is he really up too? Has Facebook turned every woman into a FBI Criminal minds analyst? Has making it ‘Facebook official’ made countless women overlook the actual feelings that a man truly has? Has the worrisome journey to try and make a man feel that he must bring up the concept, made us throw actual dating out the window? We women complain on a daily basis that their aren’t enough gentlemen left in the world, but have we scared them all away with our never ending desire to post our could be fairy tale love online?
I think it all bowls down to the generation of today. Fifty years ago, if he brought you flowers, held the door open for you, and kissed you goodnight with the promise of a later date, that would make your world. Today, not so much. We add him on Facebook the night before, and stalk like it was going out of style. We would begin to text them and if they don’t instantly reply, that was it, they either died or they left us for someone else. There is no mystery left in this world, and if he is the slightest bit mysterious, we assume he is a murderer, because I mean what else could be the explanation for someone not posting a status update every 20 minutes. Today we must know everything that is going on, what he thinks of us and why. Fifty years ago they wrote letters and hoped their love would return them. They didn’t worry about whether he was outside mowing the lawn or what his cat was doing at that exact moment. Today. we have all even coined a phrase ‘ If you really love me then post it on Facebook.’ We spend most of our time consumed with the idea of what someone is thinking about us. What that kid in math class thinks about me, what the cashier in Kroger thinks about me, what the next door neighbor really thinks about me. So its comes as no real shock that if we are worried about what the mailman may think about us, how crazy we will act towards someone whom we really care about. Must we have some sort of online proof that he has declared his profound love for us, I doubt we would even take the all famous declaration of love at the base of our balcony anymore. If your true love was standing outside your window on a foggy night to profess his love, would you call down to him begging he come inside and write it on Facebook instead, so Becky could see how much better your relationship is than hers? Why is it simply so hard for us to enjoy something, like love, by ourselves. Why can we no longer be self assured that he loves us because he tells us, not because he wrote it on my wall today. If he loves you and shows that he cares about you, isn’t that enough? Has technology changed the very idea of romance?
If he takes you out to dinner, talks about the future, and makes your heart beat like it did in the 3rd grade when your crush gave you a dinosaur valentine, do you keep him even if he doesn’t show an interest in the golden token of a public relationship?